Advice with Adam: Don't compare yourself to others

Mary Shelley published Frankenstein when she was 20. Thousands of social media “influencers” have an astronomical follower count. And writers like me are constantly on your feed. When success seems to surround us, the envy and pressure we feel are often amplified when the recipient is younger or around the same age as us. It’s a common feeling. Apart from people we interact with daily, the added exposure to success from social media and the internet understandably sets us in a frenzy. It’s important to know that you’re not alone.When I open Instagram against my better judgment, the onslaught of artists, models, and scholars fills me and probably a good amount of their followers with inadequacy. Something important to realize is that even those who are masters in their field aren’t in other ones: the valedictorian isn’t throwing touchdown passes anytime soon. No one is an expert at everything. Understanding that social comparison is probably something we all go through can help humanize those we idolize.Realizing the hero has their own faults will hopefully help you break the belief that they’re better than you. But if it still Stings when you hear the beautiful sounds of The Police through your stereo, there are a few ways you can turn your negative feelings of inadequacy into something positive.Instead of letting their prowess discourage you, try to see their progress as motivation for what you want to achieve. In almost all cases, the masters weren’t born that way. They practiced, practiced, and practiced some more. Having a growth mindset and learning from others is a nearly surefire way to improve. Additionally, you can take a more direct approach and look into their specific methods of practicing, research tips they might have, or, if you know them personally, ask them questions.With over seven billion people in the world, there’s almost always someone better at something than you. The best you can do is try to ignore your envy or use it to learn and be better.
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